I have just finished sitting on my back porch while the wind blew as the thunder clouds passed my home. I love being in the wind, in nature. The wind speaks volumes and brings a calm with it that not many other experiences do. When I am standing out in the wind, I feel a strange peace with my world, revitalized and hopeful. I watched the clouds role by and wondered if this is what the voice of God might sound like; a voice like Elijah heard on the mountain.
In that wind all my ideas regarding life and faith swirl but have no bearing on where I stand at the moment; its just me bracing and feeling the air wrap around me as I stand there. I have been reading a book called “Black Elk Speaks” and the thing that stands out to me in that book is the connectivity of a spiritual nature that he experienced in the physical elements of his world. I am jealous of that sometimes. We have separated it all out scientifically and can explain (so we think) what’s happening and from whence these elements come. I feel as though in our scientific understandings, we have lost the grace that is present there for us: God’s breath and his presence. I am not claiming an anti-scientific stance in these words, just a sense of disconnect. I suppose that is why I love the mountains like I do.
Recently I was sitting at the foot of the Cuddy Mountains with only one other friend there. It was peaceful. There were no answers but a distinct and clear connectivity and peace with the world in which I live. I really didn’t want to leave that mountain and I have thought about it so very many moments in the time since I was there. That peace, that belonging, that restfulness is something that is absent in much of my hurried life. I long to be up on a mountain somewhere, starting a camp fire, with nothing to do but what I am presently doing. Unfortunately, that is not the norm of my life but the rare exception.
Maybe I am born later than my heart and soul, a simpler time might have brought more peace and rest than the life I live. However, I am not living in such a time, so I think I need to find some ways of making the life I do have reflect that ideal.